


Risky Bismuth

by thatfakelesbian



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-12
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:19:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 20,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23608993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thatfakelesbian/pseuds/thatfakelesbian
Summary: “I just want to spend time alone with you. Come on Pearl!  Since I came back there’s always been other people around.  Before I was bubbled that first time you and I-““You promised we wouldn’t talk about what happened before you were bubbled.  That was a long time ago, Bismuth.  Things are different now.  It’s been thousands of years.”
Relationships: Bismuth & Pearl (Steven Universe), Bismuth/Pearl (Steven Universe), Bispearl
Comments: 81
Kudos: 97





	1. A Calculated Risk

“Bismuth, I can't remember; do you drink tea?”

Bismuth looked up from her place on the couch and towards the kitchen, recalling the events from the evening as she took some time to unwind. It almost felt like things were becoming normal. No, it wasn’t the same normal as before, it was different, but she knew that this was how things were supposed to feel. 

So much of life before was spent fighting and living in fear, but this wasn’t the way things were anymore. Everything was at peace. There was no more reason for fear. She wasn’t used to feeling this calm or being able to spend so much time with the people that she loved.

Most of Bismuth’s day consisted of teaching classes at Little Homeschool. Afterwards, she came back to the temple to organize some things with Pearl regarding some new courses they were looking to initiate. Pearl made sure that she stayed in charge of keeping everything organized. As she said, nobody would have been able to do it as well as her. However, she trusted Bismuth’s input and wanted to keep her involved as well. After what seemed like hours of organizing with Pearl, they decided to relax before starting their day again tomorrow.

“Uh…. I don’t think I’ve had tea before.” Bismuth replied, raising an eyebrow.

Pearl took 2 cups from the cabinet and placed them on a small wooden tray. “Ah yes, I don’t think I started making tea until a couple hundred years ago.” She poured a small amount of tea in each of them and made her way over to the couch to join Bismuth. “I’m not a fan of drinking it myself, but I love making it. The cup gets nice and warm and it emits this absolutely wonderful smell, it’s very relaxing.” She slowly picked the cup up and brought it to her nose, breathing in the aroma before placing it back down.

“I do enjoy the heat,” Bismuth replied, letting out a small laugh. She brought it to her nose and took a deep breath, mirroring Pearl. “Am I… supposed to drink this?”

Pearl nodded. “That’s what the humans do with it.”

Bismuth eyed the cup and brought it to her mouth, finishing it with one quick sip. “Ooh, that burned real nice.” She put the cup back down next to Pearl’s and leaned back on the couch.

Amethyst opened the front door and walked in with a pizza. Her eyes widened when she noticed the tea sitting on the table. “Yo, got any leftovers?” She didn’t wait for a response before coming over and grabbing the tea bags out of the cups and shoving them into her mouth. “Thank you!” She exclaimed as she ran backwards into her room in the temple.

Bismuth and Pearl both laughed and locked eyes with one another. Bismuth blushed and focused her eyes in the other direction. She cleared her throat.

“Hey Pearl, I’ve been meaning to talk to you.”

A smile played Pearl’s features. “Of course, what is it?”

“I just wanted to say thanks for introducing me to all your human friends the other day. It was really nice getting to know them.” 

Pearl smiled. “It’s no problem, they really liked you.” Bismuth thought it looked like Pearl might say something else, but nothing followed.

“Could we maybe do it again sometime?” Bismuth asked.

“Of course. Let me set a reminder on my phone.” Pearl pulled her phone from her gem. “Tomorrow I’ll send out a text and ask everyone when they are available again. Saturdays usually seem to-”

Bismuth interrupted her. “I was actually thinking,” she started, “that we could spend some time alone. Just the two of us.” 

Pearl let her phone retreat back into her gem. “Was there something wrong?”

“No… no not at all,” Bismuth stammered in response. 

Pearl raised an eyebrow inquisitively. “I know it can be strange socializing with groups of humans at first, but I promise after some practice it’ll feel much easier.”

“That’s not it.” Bismuth replied.

“Then what is it?”

“I just want to spend time alone with you. Come on Pearl! Since I came back there’s always been other people around. Before I was bubbled that first time you and I-“

“You promised we wouldn’t talk about what happened before you were bubbled. That was a long time ago, Bismuth. Things are different now. It’s been thousands of years.”

Bismuth stood up from couch and paced towards the kitchen. “Pearl, you know how I feel. And I know she came in between that a lot. You may have had thousands of years to process everything, but I haven’t been afforded that same luxury. We need to talk about it.”

Pearl angrily stood up with tears in her eyes. “I don’t WANT to talk about it, Bismuth. Please. It’s been hard enough as is.”

“The other night, things felt different. You can’t tell me you didn’t feel it too.”

Pearl walked quickly towards the temple door. “I’m sorry you misinterpreted my feelings, but I don’t want to have this discussion anymore. I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

Bismuth watched as Pearl entered her room and the door closed behind her. She let out a sigh and placed herself back on the couch, running a hand through her hair. Since being let out of her bubble for the second time, she hadn’t found a good opportunity to speak to Pearl. She hoped that because of the events that unfolded a few evenings before that this would have been the perfect time. 

She remembered what it was like over 5000 years ago the last time she tried to have this conversation with Pearl and hoped things would have been different this time around. Bismuth collected her thoughts and stepped outside, onto the beach. She tried to come up with a plan for tomorrow.


	2. It Should Be Different

‘Just calling to check in and tell you that I miss you. I stopped at a motel in Virginia. I’m having a really great time. I love you guys!’

Pearl sat on the couch, holding her phone close to her face. Garnet entered the room and Pearl quickly called her over. “Garnet! Listen to this voicemail Steven left for me.” She clicked a button and let it play again. ‘Just calling to check in and…’

“I’m going to send him a text back and tell him that we miss him too. I still want to make sure that he has his space.” Pearl paused the recording and began writing out a quick message for Steven. 

“Good idea.” Garnet responded. “I’m going to go get some things started for Little Homeschool.” She headed towards the warp and left.

Pearl replayed the message one last time. She cleaned up a few plates that Amethyst left out earlier that morning. One was on the floor, broken into two pieces. She sighed and crouched down to pick up the pieces, quietly muttering under her breath about how it wouldn’t have been hard to be a little more careful. Upon standing up, she noticed Bismuth standing outside of entrance to the house.

She made eye contact for one short moment before continuing on with her task. She dropped the broken shards into the trash. Pearl reached for her binder that was filled with the day’s lesson plan, and headed towards the door, prepared to leave. She would have normally taken the warp but needed to go to the local supply shop to pick up a few things.

Upon opening the door, Bismuth did not move to let her get by. “Pearl, please wait.”

Pearl’s focus stayed on the ground for a few moments before turning her attention upwards at the much larger gem. “I have to start my day. And you do too.”

“Not for another hour.” Bismuth interjected.

“I need to prepare some things before classes start. Please Bismuth, move.”

Bismuth stepped to the side to let Pearl by, but Pearl didn’t move. Instead, she sank to the ground, holding back tears. Bismuth met her at her level. “Hey, Pearl… what’s going on?”

Bismuth reached over to wipe away a single tear that began to flow down Pearl’s cheek, but Pearl stopped her hand before it made contact, dabbing it away herself. “I’m sorry Bismuth. I didn’t mean to snap at you yesterday. Since Steven left things have been a bit tense. I guess you can say that I’m a little on edge.” Pearl laughed through the tears that were now silently moving down her face. 

“No, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you yesterday. I wasn’t made to be able to freely express my emotions. You know better than anybody, the way we feel was never a priority. You were the first person to make me feel like it was okay. Since I met you, I’ve worked harder on not suppressing my emotions.”

Pearl broke eye contact with the ground and looked back towards Bismuth. “I never meant to make you feel like you couldn’t be open and honest with me. That wasn’t my intention. It’s just… I already know what you’re going to say. I know and… I’m not ready to respond.”

Bismuth listened to each word with care, trying to formulate a proper response. “Do you really know?”

“I think I know.” Pearl replied.

“Can’t I just say it so that you can be sure?”

Pearl nodded.

It suddenly felt as though everything fell Silent. Bismuth had tuned out all the sounds in the distance; the only thing that she could focus on was her own breathing. There was no hum of cars driving in the distance and the waves crashed onto the shore with a similar volume of leaves falling off of trees. If Pearl already knew, why was Bismuth so scared to say what she was thinking? The fear of Pearl responding held her back for a few more moments before she cleared her throat and began to speak.

“I’m in love with you.” Bismuth whispered.

They both sat quietly in each other’s presence. The sound of the world moving became more audible for Bismuth as she waited for a response. The seconds felt like minutes, and tension filled the space around them. 

Pearl sighed. “I know.”

This was a conversation they had thousands of years ago. Bismuth had proclaimed her feelings for Pearl one day while they were on the battlefield when Bismuth had been warned by Garnet that she might be shattered. They always had a closer than average relationship, but Pearl always went back to Pink, feeling guilty, as if she had betrayed her. 

“Things used to be different with us, Pearl.” Bismuth pushed her hair around, seemingly looking for a way to preoccupy her hands. “I think if Pink wasn’t around back then, we might have been together.”

Bismuth watched as a smile began to pass over Pearl’s features. The smile quickly faded as Pearl looked up and stopped her. “Was there anything else?” She asked beginning to compose herself. 

In light of the recent events, Bismuth really hoped Pearl’s response would have been better. They had been so much closer, and Pink was no longer between them. Bismuth let out a deep sigh. “No, that was it.” She didn’t want to push Pearl any harder, fearing she might lose her as even a friend.

Pearl nodded; the tears began to slow down. She picked herself up from the ground, reaching for the binder that fell when she did. “I really should get going now.” Pearl set off into town to purchase some supplies, and Bismuth began walking towards Little Homeschool.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woah, so sorry it took like two months for me to put out another chapter. I've had most of it written for like a month now but just got around to finishing it. I hope that there are still some people interested in reading this story. Please let me know if you are! The next one should be up way faster. If you can, comment and let me know what you think, critiques are greatly appreciated. :D


	3. Once an upper-crust, always an upper-crust.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Got a bit of a longer chapter for ya here. I hope you enjoy it! :D

Bismuth scanned her notes as she walked back towards the temple. Another successful day at Little Homeschool was behind her and they were integrating more gems than ever into life on Earth. Almost all of the gems they taught were becoming a part of society in one way or another by finding jobs and hobbies that fit their personalities and interests. Bismuth was so happy to have a job that she loved that was apart from serving Homeworld. She started to feel like she did when she first started working with the original Crystal Gems. Only this time, they were working for a better cause. There was no longer anybody to fight.

Flipping through pages and coming up with the beginnings of a lesson plan for tomorrow, Bismuth grew anxious as she came closer to the temple. She was afraid of seeing Pearl, wondering if things might feel distant between the two of them. Her time during the Gem War, before being bubbled, didn’t feel like it was that long ago. In the contents of the bubble, time just stopped. When she was released by Steven, it was as though she had blinked, and 5000 years passed. She reflected on the days where it felt as though Pearl felt the same way for her. Pearl had time to distance herself from the situation, and Bismuth wasn’t afforded that same luxury. 

The tall gem tried to push her anxiety about what happened that morning to the back of her head so that her and Pearl could focus on getting ready for tomorrow. She had no plans of bringing up the situation for the time being to avoid pushing Pearl any further away. Upon reaching her destination, Bismuth recognized whispered voices coming from inside the temple. Not wanting to interfere on anybody’s privacy, but filled with natural curiosity, she stopped for just a moment to listen. She could make out Garnet and Amethysts voices but was having trouble detecting any distinguishable words. She took a few quiet steps closer, leaning her ear towards the direction of the sound. Pearl’s voice spoke the loudest now.

“- and Bismuth told me that she-“ 

Bismuth dropped her small binder, and while it didn’t make much noise, she figured it made enough that anyone inside the temple would have heard it. Wanting to avoid getting caught eavesdropping, she quickly picked up the binder filled with her notes and headed up the stairs, hoping they would just excuse the sound as a louder than average footstep. Nearing the top of the steps, she noticed the gems sitting inside on the couch. The corner of Pearl’s eye met Bismuth’s before she quickly turned her head away back towards the other gems.

“So I was thinking that we, ahem,” she cleared her throat, “we… um, try out that idea for a new class…” Bismuth could tell that Pearl wanted to appear as though she wasn’t just talking about her. A sinking feeling filled her chest, but she allowed a smile to come over her face as she started walking inside, pretending she didn’t hear them talking about her seconds before.

Bismuth opened the temple door and let herself in. “Hey, sorry if I I’m interrupting. Are you ready to work on that lesson plan now, Pearl?”

Pearl stood up and dusted off her lap. She nodded and removed herself from the couch. Before exiting the room, she turned back towards Garnet and Amethyst. Amethyst had already distracted herself with a bag of Chaps, while Garnet sat on the couch, turned towards the pair with a tense look on her face.

“I’ll be back later, and then we can talk more about the… classes.” Pearl declared, questionably. Garnet gave a silent thumbs up, paired with an overly large smile.

Bismuth and Pearl found themselves walking along the beach. They were silent for quite a while before Bismuth finally spoke. “Do you wanna head to my house? We can set up some of our plans on my table. I think it’ll be a lot easier than if we stay out here.”

Pearl looked relieved that Bismuth chose to speak first. “No, I don’t think it’ll take too long,” she retorted, “Actually, I wanted to talk to you about something.”

Bismuth’s heart began racing in her chest. She didn’t think Pearl wanted to talk about the events that unfolded this morning any longer. Bismuth had no intentions of bringing it up. She noticed a worried look on Pearl’s face. Pearl declined to speak for thirty seconds or so, appearing to be contemplating how she wanted to phrase the next words that were about to come out of her mouth.

“I’m going to be working on planning classes for Little Homeschool by myself for a while. I think you should take a break. Not forever, but… for now.”

“Is this because of what I said to you?”

“Yes.” Pearl responded without hesitation.

“I’m sorry, I really am. I never meant to make you feel uncomfortable, Pearl. Does this mean you don’t want me helping with teaching classes too?”

“No, you can still teach your classes, of course. I’m just going to have Amethyst assist you for the time being.”

Bismuth nodded. “I understand.”

Pearl stopped and kept her gaze facing the water. “Well, I’ve actually pretty much finished up everything we need for tomorrow, that was really all I wanted to talk about.”

Bismuth raised her eyebrows and let out a quiet sigh. “Ah, gotcha. Guess you won’t be needing me for anything else today then.” 

“I guess not. Thank you for understanding.” 

Bismuth felt defeated, she didn’t think that anything she could say would make any difference. Pearl sat down on the beach, and patted the sand next to her, asking Bismuth to join. Bismuth followed, noticing how beautiful the water looked as the sun set over it. Most of the time, she found herself having a difficult time focusing on anything but Pearl. When Pearl spoke, walked into a room, smiled, laughed, or did just about anything else, she had Bismuth’s full attention. She never had these feelings towards anyone else for as long as she had existed. She didn’t know what love was until forming a deep connection with Pearl. She didn’t understand how this feeling of love could be so captivating yet hurt so much. She wanted nothing more than to lean over and hold Pearl in her arms and tell her how much she meant to her.

But for now, she settled with sitting next to her on the beach, overlooking a beautiful sunset.

“When Rose, or uh- Pink was around… I never really felt like my own person.” Pearl began. “I spent so long belonging to someone, and she made me feel like I was free but, only so much. Pink told me that I was the most important person to her, and all of the sudden, I had worth.” Pearl laughed, and while she looked happy, a certain level of sadness hid behind her eyes. 

“If you’re not comfortable talking about this-” Bismuth interjected.

“Bismuth, it’s important that you know what Pink put me through. In some ways, she did help me a lot in becoming my own person, but in many other ways it set me back. If someone tells you that you are the only one that matters to them, shouldn’t they act like it? She told me she loved me, that she only wanted to be with me, but…” 

Tear began to fill her eyes. She tried to hold them back. Bismuth wanted to reach over and place a hand on her shoulder in an attempt to comfort her but feared it might make things worse. Against her better judgment, she did anyway. But Pearl did not pull away this time, she leaned into Bismuth further. She felt Pearl press her face against her arm, moisture filling the spot where her eyes were. 

“She slept with other humans all the time. She would leave for days, sometimes weeks. Someone who cares about you doesn’t do that. When she came back, she would apologize, and tell me they meant nothing to her, and that I was the most important person again and that I had nothing to worry about.” 

Bismuth carefully ran her hand over Pearl’s hair. She made sure to not overdo it.

Pearl sniffled and spoke more clearly now. “She never liked how close we were. She suspected that I might have feelings for you, or you might have feelings for me. Sometimes I wonder if that was part of the reason that she bubbled you. And after you were bubbled, it was like she wanted to hurt me. Pink wanted to explore more interesting people. I foolishly came back to her every single time. I waited for her to come back when she was gone. I would do nothing else but wait, hoping that she was okay, that she was alive, that she would be back soon. I just waited. I didn’t belong to anybody, but I did. Everything I did was for her, Bismuth. Every second she was gone was about her; it was always about her.”

Pearl moved away from Bismuth and put her head into her lap, filling the space around them with muffled sobs. “I don’t ever want to belong to somebody again. Not like that. I’m sorry, please just understand why I can’t do that to myself again. You know that I care about you so much Bismuth. I don’t want to get too comfortable and allow myself to be manipulated by someone like Rose did to me for thousands of years.”

“I would never hurt you like she hurt you. She never treated you the way you deserved to be treated. As much as she might have wanted to deny it, she was still an upper-crust, and she could never fully understand what it’s like to be one of us. You were in a toxic, emotionally abusive relationship. I know why you’re scared, but don’t ever think that I would treat you like she treated you. I just want to make you feel loved, and not be afraid to love someone again.”

Pearl wiped her tears with a sleeve of her jacket. “I just can’t. I can’t ever feel for you how you feel for me. I’m sorry. But please, just-”

Bismuth placed her hand on Pearl’s jaw, and pulled her in, pressing her lips firmly into Pearl’s. Pearl leaned in, grabbing Bismuth’s arm and bringing it closer. Bismuth knew that she could convince Pearl that it was possible to love again. Pink was no longer going to have a hold on her and her emotions. She was gone, and she had no right to still have this much of an effect on Pearl. Pearl melted into Bismuth’s arms. They both knew that this was what they wanted, but the smaller gem pulled back and turned away once again. 

“I just… can’t. I can’t be with anyone. I can’t go through that again.” Pearl stood up and stumbled back into the temple. 

“Please don’t go,” Bismuth plead, but she was already out of earshot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hmmm.. did Bismuth take advantage of Pearl's emotions and vulnerability a little bit there? Maybe. But let me know what you think!!! Please please please if you like this story I would really appreciate a review! I'm super open to critiques, what can I improve on? What do you want to happen? Let me know if you want chapters that are / a bit / longer like this. If you review, it will help me get chapters up more quickly. Sometimes I feel like I'm just writing this for myself, which is fine but still. LOL.


	4. No More Hiding

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry it took me so long to update. Life has been crazy. This chapter is a bit shorter, but I'm already working on chapter 5 so stay tuned!

Things continued on like normal for a while. Well, mostly normal. Weeks had passed and Pearl and Bismuth hadn’t talked any more about what happened between them on the beach. They actually hadn’t talked at all. Bismuth had endless hours to reflect on her decision to kiss Pearl. Her feelings got the best of her in the moment, but she couldn’t help but feel that Pearl might have felt taken advantage of. The day after the kiss, they passed each other a few times between classes at Little Homeschool. Pearl refused to look at Bismuth at first, but as time went on, they began exchanging a few awkward glances and half-smiles. 

She wasn’t sure if she should talk to Pearl first and apologize, or if she should wait for Pearl to come to her. She weighed the pros and cons of each situation in her head and settled on waiting for a bit longer before coming up with a concrete decision. If Pearl didn’t come to her soon, Bismuth leaned towards apologizing. Either way, she didn’t want to do anything yet. 

Bismuth found herself cleaning up some supplies from her workshop after a long day of teaching blacksmithing to interested gems. It was Friday and there were no classes tomorrow, so she looked forward to having the next couple of days to herself. After putting some scrap metal and tools away, she noticed Garnet standing in the door of her workshop’s building.

“Oh, hey there Garnet, here for a last-minute weapon-making lesson?” Bismuth chuckled and leaned against her worktable, crossing her arms.

Garnet shook her head. “As much as I would love to learn, I think I’m good with these.” She said, making her gem weapons appear.

“The modifications I made still working for you?” Bismuth asked, raising an eyebrow.

“No complaints here, but I haven’t had much of a use for them lately. Hopefully, it’ll stay that way.”

“I’m sure it will. These days I mostly specialize in armor making, anyway. I’m sure my weapon-making skills would be a little rusty.”

Garnet let a small smile come over her face before continuing on with the conversation. “I think we should talk about Pearl.” 

Bismuth’s grin faded and a more serious expression replaced it. “Oh, yeah… uh, what about exactly?”

“I’m not going to sugar coat it. She’s told me about what happened, and she’s upset. I see several possible outcomes. The best thing you can do right now is to make a decision on what you want to do. If you want to talk to her, don’t wait too long. She's not going to come to you."

Bismuth nodded and sighed. “Are you gonna let me know what’s gonna happen… or?”

“I think it’s better that you figure that out for yourself.” Garnet began to exit the workshop.

“Wait, Garnet! Is it… is it bad?” Bismuth asked

Garnet was already out of sight by the time that Bismuth finished her question. “Just talk to her.” She yelled back, and soon enough she was not only out of sight but also out of earshot.

Bismuth placed herself on a chair in the corner of the workshop, thinking about how she would talk to Pearl. She didn’t know what to say to her and was concerned that her reaction might be negative no matter what. The guilt had been floating in her head since she kissed Pearl and wondered if things could go back to feeling normal for them. They went from things being perfect to Bismuth feeling like she ruined it by telling and showing Pearl how she felt. At the end of the day, she knew she couldn’t hold in her feelings any longer but never meant to put Pearl in such a vulnerable situation.

She almost wished that she didn’t have any sort of feelings for Pearl. She asked herself why she couldn’t be okay with just being friends with her. Did she ruin things for good? The thoughts continued to circulate, and after about an hour Bismuth decided it was time to go and relax. Bismuth’s house was right above her workshop. She headed up the stairs and sat in her living space. Not usually being one to sleep but finding herself growing exhausted from a roller coaster of emotions filling her head, she laid herself down on the couch. Her eyes slowly closed, and she drifted off to sleep.

A pounding sensation filled her head. Bismuth rubbed her eyes and started to open them. She glanced towards the clock on the wall, had 18 hours really passed? The clock ticked quietly on the wall, but somehow it felt so loud at that moment. For someone who didn’t sleep, that was a lot of sleep. She started to recall what Garnet told her the day before. Pearl had to have been busy since Bismuth was no longer helping her organize lesson plans. Amethyst and Garnet had their own great qualities but lacked the same teaching and organization expertise that Bismuth had. Pearl must’ve had a heavier workload, Bismuth thought, now that she did not have her assistance. On what usually would have been her day off, Bismuth assumed she would have spent it working.

She finally found the strength to pull herself off the couch and lead herself into the workshop. Reaching for a switch on the wall caused a small pit of lava to open up on the floor. Bismuth leaned down and stuck her head into it, refreshing herself so she would be able to think more clearly. She pressed the switch again, covering it back up under metal floorboards. Pacing back and forth, ideas started flowing out of her mouth while she tried to come up with a game plan.

“Maybe I’ll bring her some flowers… or I’ll go to the store and get her that tea she liked? Ugh, no.”

The stressed gem felt that her apology would be less sincere if in the form of a gift.

“I could get the tea and tell her that I’m sorry and I’ll leave her alone. Does she want me to leave her alone?”

Bismuth thought, what does Pearl want? Does Pearl want things to be resolved, for them to continue to be friends with no mention of what happened? Does Pearl want to keep herself at a distance from Bismuth going forward? Or maybe, does Pearl want something more with Bismuth? No. No. That wasn’t a possibility. Pearl had been loud and clear about not wanting any sort of romantic relationship with anyone.

She thought she could come up with a plan to take away the smaller gem’s anxieties about relationships. She hated that Pink Diamond made her feel that way. She still had such a hold over Pearl’s life. Yes, she was making great strides, but it felt like Pearl still belonged to her. Pink had been gone for years, but in some ways, it was as though she never left. 

She replayed the words of advice Garnet had told her the previous day. It didn’t matter what she did, but she had to make a decision now. After being bubbled for years, she didn’t want to waste a second longer on any missed opportunities. Bismuth decided that being honest with Pearl and speaking to her was more important than anything. Going forward, she wasn’t sure if she could live a life as Pearl’s friend. She weighed her decisions against each other. On one hand, she might risk losing Pearl as even a friend, but she also wouldn’t have to go on hiding her feelings.

‘That’s it.’ She thought. ‘I need to speak to Pearl.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know there isn't like a huge demand or anything for this story, but I got a few reviews over the past couple of months that encouraged me to write more! I know my updates have been few and far between, but I have a little bit more of a plan now for where I want this story to go, so I really hope if you like it you stick around! I think it'll be worth it. Thank you to anybody reading this. <3


	5. Silent Waterfalls

Time moves slowly when you’ve spent the last couple thousand years completely unaware of your surroundings. Bismuth, as well as many other of the original Crystal Gems, missed out on huge portions of their lives. Might things have been different if all that lost time had been reclaimed? Would more time spent with Pearl have allowed her to move past her feelings for her? If she could have processed things with time, maybe she wouldn’t feel like she had to decide between being Pearl’s friend and losing her completely.

So much of Bismuth’s life felt like it was taken from her. What did she miss out on? No matter how much her friends filled her in on their adventures in the years she was gone, she knew it wasn’t the same as truly experiencing it. Most of Bismuth’s existence was spent falling in love with Pearl, and she didn’t think Pearl felt the same way. To be fair, a very small part of Bismuth felt like Pearl did love her back, but that her trauma would not allow her to be in a relationship. But still, she wondered, why wasn’t her promise that things could be different enough for her?

Trauma was more complicated than that. The large gem worried that she had pushed Pearl too much and ruined any potential chance at a relationship that they could have. If her feelings were reciprocated, maybe Bismuth came on too strong, causing Pearl to distance herself. Waiting and wondering wasn’t the way she wanted to do things anymore. She needed to know. She cared so much for Pearl, and if she didn’t want Bismuth around anymore, she was willing to leave. What did that mean though? Where would she go? While considering leaving was a real possibility, she figured she would deal with that when the time came. “If” didn’t seem like an option. It was just a matter of time. Either way, she knew that today, she was going to talk to Pearl.

It was early Sunday morning. Bismuth, who was not known to sleep often if at all, had spent the last 18 hours asleep. Her dreams were jumbled, and she couldn’t remember clearly what happened in any of them. In one, she thought she might have been learning to surf, but that was the only thing that really came to mind. She had wished that she dreamed about Pearl. The only other dream she could recall having was about a year ago. Her and Pearl were in the arcade, and then walked along the boardwalk together. It was sweet and innocent, and reminiscing about this dream brought her back to a time that life felt easier.

Was it ever really easy though? She was hiding her feelings the entire time, which of course was not ideal. However, Pearl and her were still on good terms. It didn’t seem like that was the case anymore. Bismuth was alone. The one gem that Bismuth could go to for absolutely everything was Pearl. Granted, Bismuth was able to get by on her own, but often made up problems as an excuse to spend a few extra minutes with her favorite gem. 

‘Pearl, can you explain to me how electricity works?’ She would ask. She didn’t /really/ care, but the passion on Pearl’s face when it came to teaching was incredible. She loved seeing Pearl happy and watching her teach was something that really did it for her. That was one of the main reasons that Bismuth started teaching. While she was excited to share her knowledge with other gems, working alongside Pearl, and having her teach her how to teach, well that made Pearl happier than ever. For weeks Pearl taught her the ins and outs of teaching. Bismuth found herself really loving it.

Bismuth moved her head from side to side, light cracks coming after each turn. She stood up, stretched her arms towards the ceiling and let out a deep sigh. No matter what happened, it was going to be okay.

‘I’m not going to pressure her,’ she thought, ‘I just need her to know how I feel and why I can’t stay here any longer if she doesn’t feel the same way.’

Bismuth didn’t want to put pressure on Pearl but needed her to know that she couldn’t pretend to be her friend anymore. She couldn’t pretend that she wasn’t in love with Pearl. It was too hard.

The large, rainbow haired gem found herself pacing around her living space, going over in her head what exactly she was going to say. She figured that rehearsing her words didn’t matter. Knowing how anxious she would feel in the moment meant she would probably just speak from her heart, saying whatever came to mind. No more wasted time, she was ready to speak to Pearl.

Bismuth thought about the last few weeks as she walked towards the temple. Pearl had been seen carrying extra binders than usual, looking overwhelmed as she shuffled into classrooms. Her hands were most certainly full without the assistance of Bismuth. This was no slight towards Garnet and Amethyst who had taken over some of the responsibilities Bismuth once held, she just knew that her and Pearl’s system had worked very well. Pearl was known to be organized but scheduling and teaching several classes kept her occupied and didn’t give her a lot of free time. Bismuth helped.

The temple came into frame. She had gotten used to walking and found herself enjoying her walks more than warping. She didn’t want to miss out on any more of life. The little things on her walk made her smile, like a seagull eating from a bag of stale fries, or a couple laying out on a towel on the beach. The world around her changed every day, and she loved to see it. 

Once she reached the bottom of the steps to the temple, she took one more deep breath and composed herself. Dusting off her shirt and pants, she made her way up the stairs. She peered inside the door when she got to the top and didn’t see Pearl. Garnet sat inside on the couch alone, legs crossed, eyes focused on the television.

Bismuth approached the door and knocked, getting Garnet’s attention. She waved her inside and Bismuth joined her on the couch. 

“Is uh... is Pearl here?”

“How was your long nap?” Garnet laughed.

“How did you...” Bismuth paused, somehow always forgetting about future vision. “It was okay.” Bismuth moved some locks of rainbow hair from her face. “I don’t really like sleeping. I don’t get how humans do it all the time.”

“They need to, and the typically don’t sleep for 18 hours.” She chuckled. “Pearl is in town, but she should be back shortly. You can wait in here if you’d like.” Garnet reached for the remote and shut the TV off. “I’ve got some Bismuth to attend to anyway,” she said, retreating towards the inner sanctums of the temple. “Don’t hold back. Tell her how you feel.” Garnet said, and then she was out of sight. 

Tell her how you feel. The words rang in her head. That didn’t go so well last time. Just moments after Garnet disappeared, Pearl came through the door.

Bismuth quickly stood up and cleared her throat. “Pearl.” She said nervously.

Pearl looked surprised and averted her eyes away, clearly nervous. “Bismuth… I uh… wasn’t expecting to see you.” She mumbled.

“I need to talk to you Pearl. I have a lot on my chest right now. Could you spare a couple of moments for me?”

Pearl, still visibly nervous, set down her belonging on a chair near the front door. She rubbed her hands together, trying to find a way to occupy herself before answering. “Yes. Why don’t we head into my room in the inner temple? I agree, we do need to speak.”

Not expecting Pearl to be very receptive to a conversation, she happily nodded, a small smile playing her features as she followed Pearl into her room. 

Pearl’s room consisted of several different waterfalls, as well as a small dry area in the middle in between them. In the past, being around this much water made things loud, but the water was almost silent. They sat in between them, both declining to speak first as usual. Starting these conversations between them had been so awkward lately.

“As I’ve told you before… I mean... you already know how I feel about you. I have to be honest though, I don’t think I can be around you anymore. I’m so in love with you, Pearl. You make me feel things that I didn’t know a gem could feel.” Bismuth smiled, clutching her chest and looking down. Her expression quickly changed to sadness. “But I can’t keep pretending that I’m okay with being your friend. It’s too painful. Seeing you these past few weeks, and not even being able to talk you… I don’t like it. Things aren’t the same anymore. I just-” she stammered, a few tears coming into her vision.

“Bismuth.” Pearl said quietly. “I’m gonna say something corny.” She inched close to her and wiped away a tear from her face. “It’s not you, it’s me.”

“What do you mean?” Bismuth questioned, a bit of blush lingering on her cheeks from Pearl’s simple affectionate act.

“It’s not that I don’t want to be with you. I just can’t. It’s too hard, and I’m scared.”

“So,” Bismuth started, a bit of hopefulness in her voice, “Do you want to be with me?”

Pearl averted her gaze. “It’s more complicated than that.”

“It doesn’t have to be.”

“I care so much for you. I know that you know that. I haven’t exactly kept that very well hidden.” She took a few moments before continuing on. “But I can’t risk being with someone again. My relationship with Pink was so bad. I really need you to understand.”

“I promise you Pearl, if you give me a chance, it’ll be different.” She took Pearl’s small hand in hers. Pearl directed her eyes upwards, locking her gaze with Bismuth. “If you want to be with me, if even a small part of you wants to be with me, let me show you how much better a loving and healthy relationship is. I want to give you the whole world. I want to make you happy.”

Pearl blushed and smiled. “You already make me so happy.”

“I can make you even happier.”

“Bismuth… if we do this, it’s going to take me a while to be comfortable. You are already so important to me, and I don’t want to lose you. I really want to give things a chance, but I’m scared. I’m absolutely terrified.” Pearl laughed and paused for a moment. “And even though I’m scared, every time I’m around you I want to kiss you. I want to do silly things like hold your hand and touch your face. I want to be wrapped in your arms and smile and laugh with you. I want to be with you. I do. But I don’t know if I can.”

“Can I kiss you right now?” 

“Thank you for asking this time, but no. I’d like to be the one to kiss you.” She made her way into Bismuth’s frame, pressing her lips to Bismuth’s. The world slowed around them, like Bismuth had seen in so many movie and television scenes. It didn’t feel real. Was she sure she had woken up from her long nap?

There was no doubt she was awake; this was just not the route she expected things to go when she came to the temple today. Pearl’s hand found Bismuth’s cheek, moving slowly up to her hair as she lightly grasped a few rainbow locks. For a minute, their mouths moved in unison, both of them melting deeper into the kiss as time went on. Chills rushed through Bismuth’s body as Pearl pulled away.

Pearl spoke first. “I don’t know if I fully know what love is anymore. But I know I feel strongly about you. I want things to work, just be patient with me.”

“What does this mean for us?” Bismuth asked.

“Well,” Pearl contemplated, “I certainly don’t want you to leave. If my fears are the reason for you thinking you can’t be here anymore, I want to work to move past them. It’s not going to be easy.”

Blush covered the larger gem’s cheeks. “Can I ask you something else? I hope it doesn’t sound stupid.”

“Nothing you could ever say would sound stupid to me.”

Bismuth took a deep breath in. “I know it’s kind of a human thing, but can I call you my girlfriend?” 

Pearl laughed for a few moments and tried to compose herself. “Of course.” She said between giggles. “What exactly does that mean to you?”

She smiled. “It means that we’re together, and only together with each other. I love you, and I will only ever love you. I am committed to us, and to making you feel comfortable in every way possible.”

Pearl’s quiet laughs turned into tears of happiness and relief as she settled into Bismuth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise this isn't the end yet! Continuing to send thanks to anybody who has stuck with this story up until this point. It's taken months for me to get to this point. I spent the last 3 months working way too much and buried in school work. But my good old job at Spirit Halloween has come to an end! Ahh, unemployment. I'm really hoping to write more consistently as time goes forward. I still have a lot planned for this story and I promise it isn't all fluff. Let me know what you think! Will they be able to make it work?


	6. Chamomile

The pair had spent the last few hours talking about what their relationship meant. They spoke about the finer details, confronted many fears that both of them had, but left things in a comfortable place moving forward. Pearl wasn’t completely sure what it meant to be in a relationship but trusted that Bismuth did not want to hurt her. The fears weren’t gone, but after speaking to her for a prolonged period of time, they were at bay, at least for now. The idea of being called Bismuth’s girlfriend made her feel a bit uneasy. It was hard for her to move past the idea of ownership even after all this time, but Bismuth made it known that wasn’t what it was. It was commitment, not ownership. Commitment. She tried to remind herself that when the fearful thoughts popped into her head.

She didn’t know what a healthy relationship was and was unsure if she even knew what love was. But she did know that Bismuth made her happy and wanted it to stay that way. She couldn’t imagine any version of Bismuth that made her unhappy. The few hours they spent talking after deciding to be together also consisted of more kissing. A lot of kissing, actually. Pink and Pearl never kissed that often. Pearl thought at one point they might fuse but wasn’t sure if she was ready for that. Fusing was powerful, beautiful, intense. Something you could only do with someone you had a strong connection with. And while they did have a strong connection, it felt like a big step she wasn’t ready for just yet. 

Pearl couldn’t stop thinking about kissing Bismuth. Though Bismuth was gone now, it continued to linger in her mind. The taste and feel of Bismuth’s lips remained. Realizing she’d been sporting a smile on her face for the last couple of minutes made her happy, but also created a sense of vulnerability. She was terrified to be vulnerable because in past experiences vulnerability meant it was easy for her to be taken advantage of. However, she reminded herself that Bismuth was not Pink. They were not the same person and truly believed that things could be different. Bismuth eased those worries. She was reassuring, calm, and loving. Bismuth addressed her concerns and knew that while things would still come up and that they may still face fears, that it wouldn’t be met with hostility if Pearl brought them to her new partner.

Since they spoke, even though Bismuth had gone to take care of some of the work that Pearl had been so overwhelmed with the past couple of weeks, she didn’t move from the spot in between the waterfalls where they previously sat. She laid back, taking in the quiet, gentle sounds of water that surrounded her. Though they had spent a lot of time sitting between the water, sharing kisses, laughs, smiles, and tears, she already found herself missing Bismuth’s presence. But she recognized the importance of having time to herself to continue to process things. She slowly stood up and removed herself from her room in the temple, entering the main space of their household. 

Immediately, she was greeted by Garnet and Amethyst sitting excitedly on the couch. Garnet made her glasses disappear and smiled, locking eyes with Pearl.

“I already have a feeling of how it went, but I want you to tell me anyway,” Garnet said.

“Well, we talked and-.” Bismuth started.

Amethyst bounced up and down on the couch while smiling and interrupted Pearl quickly. “You guys were sure in there for a long time… I have to know EVERYTHING!” Stars filled her eyes.

Pearl laughed and joined them on the couch, letting them in on some of the details. There were some parts she wanted to keep private.

“You’re in loooove.” Amethyst teased. 

A light blue blush passed over Pearl’s cheeks. “I don’t know about love yet, but I am very happy.” 

“I have a feeling you’ll get there,” Garnet claimed, a twinkle passing over her eyes as she made her glasses reappear.

Pearl laughed, a bit of a nervous but happy laugh. Love was scary but being with Bismuth was not.

“Well….” Amethyst began, “Garnet said it would probably be good news, so I invited some people over to celebrate!” She ran to the front door letting in Lapis and Peridot.

“Hello!” Peridot exclaimed, bringing all attention to herself. “I was informed of some very exciting news, so I brought you this!” She said excitedly, pulling out a drawing from behind her back. It was cute and simple in typical Peridot fashion. A hand-drawn picture of Bismuth and Period holding hands. Sure, the proportions were off. Pearl and Bismuth were the same size, but Pearl smiled nonetheless and took the drawing into her hands, studying it before organizing it into her gem.

“Thank you, I don’t think this calls for all this celebration, however.”

Peridot’s smile faded and was replaced with a look of confusion. “But you guys are together, why wouldn’t we celebrate?” An eyebrow arched on her face, but she quickly moved on to her next train of thought. “Hey, where is Bismuth anyway? Aren’t we here because of both of you?”

Pearl nodded, “It seems that’s why you’re here, but-.”

Amethyst stood from the couch, “Ooooh, yeah! Let’s invite Bismuth over!” 

Pearl shook her head to protest but was ignored as Garnet took out her phone to contact Bismuth. “I hardly think that’s necessary, she and I already discussed everything we needed to discuss today.” While the thought of seeing Bismuth again so soon wasn’t something she was opposed to, she didn’t like that everyone was making a huge deal out of their relationship. This was private, between her and Bismuth. It was okay that everybody knew but being so open about everything they had just shared only increased her worry of feeling vulnerable again. 

Keeping her feelings inside wasn’t an option anymore. “Listen, I understand that you’re all excited, but this is new to me. And to Bismuth. Please, let’s not make this more than it has to be just yet.”

Garnet placed her phone down and looked at Pearl. “You’re right Pearl, I’m sorry if we overstepped. You can invite her if you would like, but we don’t all need to know every detail.” She glanced towards Amethyst and Peridot who looked disappointed. Lapis kept her attention towards Pearl and interjected.

“Some things are better kept private until you’re ready.” They exchanged small smiles with one another. “Thanks for telling us how you’re feeling.”

A small amount of tension filled the room, but Pearl was ready to diffuse it. “I’ll make some tea; we can watch a movie and relax for a bit. We all deserve it after the week we’ve had at Little Homeschool.” They shared a laugh collectively, reflecting on their classes. “Just give me a bit to run to the store and pick up some things.” Pearl walked to the warp and set towards Bismuth’s house.

Bismuth was alone, scrolling mindlessly through channels on the television. Her thoughts stayed on Pearl, unable to focus on much else. Things had gone so well, better than expected, and she continued to feel like she was in a dream. A knock at her door at this time of the evening surprised her, but when she was met with Pearl’s face, she smiled.

“Couldn’t stay away, could you?” She said smoothly, pulling the smaller gem into her frame.

Pearl leaned upwards and placed a kiss on Bismuth’s lips. “I suppose not.”

“What brings you back here?” 

“We’re having a movie night at the temple. Lapis and Peridot came by and I thought it would be nice if you joined us.”

“A movie night? Can I sit next to you?” She smiled.

“Of course.” Pearl blushed. “But I should warn you, Garnet filled them in on what happened, and they are probably going to ask a lot of questions.” 

“Let them!” She exclaimed, then noted Pearl’s expression change. “But just because they ask, doesn’t mean we have to answer.” Pearl shifted her eyes upwards. 

“Thank you, Bismuth.” 

“What movie are we going to watch?” 

Pearl laughed and shook her head. “I didn’t get that far yet. Would you like to come to the store with me to get some tea?”

The store was quiet for a Saturday night. They skimmed the aisles and picked up a few things they knew Amethyst would enjoy like chaps and microwavable pizza, and then headed towards the tea aisle.

“Chamomile or green tea… any preferences? I know you keep a lot of green tea around, is that one of your favorites?” Bismuth wondered.

“Chamomile. I drink it every once and a while too. It’s very light, it has earthy undertones with a bit of apple.”

Bismuth beamed as she grabbed a box of chamomile tea. 

Back at the temple, the gems gossiped about what had happened. They weren’t going to bombard the couple with questions upon their return but talked about what this meant for Pearl and Bismuth going forward. They concluded that not much would change; they were inseparable as is before all of this happened.

Once they arrived home, Lapis greeted them with an awkward smile. “So… how was the store?”

Peridot ran towards Bismuth and hugged her leg. “I’m so happy. It’s like that episode of Camp Pining Hearts when Percy-.”

“Hold it tiny.” Bismuth pushed Peridot away from her. “Take it down a notch. I’m just here to join your movie night.”

The movie they ended up picking was a cheesy rom-com suggested by Peridot and Amethyst. The rest didn’t really care what they watched. Bismuth and Pearl cared the least. They were happy to sit next to each other. Bismuth’s arm draped over Pearl’s shoulders, bringing her deep into her side. Pearl rested her head comfortably on Bismuth’s chest, her finger lightly rubbing Bismuth’s leg.

At some point during the movie, Bismuth turned her face towards Pearl, and discreetly kissed her. Blush lingered on Pearl’s cheeks and she settled back into her. The larger gem’s hand moved to her girlfriend’s hips, bringing her in even closer. 

The movie ended and Pearl escorted Bismuth back home on the warp. While they both enjoyed walking over warping, especially with such small distances, they preferred taking the warp when it was dark. When they arrived outside Bismuth’s house, they exchanged another kiss.

“I really like kissing you.” Pearl teased.

“I like kissing you too. You’re my favorite person I’ve ever kissed. To be fair, I’ve never kissed anyone else before, but I feel like you’d still be the best.”

“I’ve kissed a few humans. And one gem. But you’re my favorite too.”

They delayed parting for a couple of moments before finally separating for the night. Bismuth reclaimed her spot on a couch in front of the television she forgot to turn off before she departed earlier. She laid back but then wondered about the other humans that Pearl had been with and when she was with them. It wasn’t that important, it just sat in her mind for a few moments before she drifted off to sleep for the second time this week.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter is being written right now, and I've been working on some art (it's not that good I'm not the best artist but it's decent) that will help go along with some stuff for it!


	7. Moonstone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lindsey? Updating quickly? Having no job and way too much free time on her hands? Really getting excited about this story and having the motivation to write?

Pearl sat tensely on the corner of the couch. Lapis and Peridot were gone; Amethyst and Garnet retreated to their rooms in the temple. She had a lot of time alone to think before she and Bismuth reconnected in the morning to finalize some plans for upcoming classes that week. Rain began to fall outside the window, slowly at first and then all at once like a symphony coming together. It was loud against the roof and it put her at ease while she relaxed against soft cushions. Anxieties about the past came to the forefront of her mind. Her relationship with Pink, the Gem War, and even the last few years before everything finally calmed down. It had been an endless battle and while she felt comfortable right now, she always wondered if something was going to come next.

The morning came and she and Bismuth tried to put their attention on work but easily got distracted by one another. They met a little extra early anticipating that. They were excited and giggly when Garnet entered the room. 

“How’d you guys enjoy the movie last night?”

“It was good.” Bismuth responded.

“I have a feeling you weren’t paying too much attention to the movie.” Garnet retorted with a grin.

Pearl laughed and turned back to the binders in front of them, trying to keep on task.

“I just don’t see the purpose of making weapons anymore. I think you should put that to the side and teach armor making primarily.” Pearl stated.

“Look, I know there probably isn’t going to be anyone to fight anymore, at least hopefully not for a while, so if we’re taking weapons off the table then you could argue that armor could be taken off too.” Bismuth retorted.

“I supposed you’re right,” Pearl concluded, “So maybe we start teaching furniture making for the new gem’s homes. We’ve still got more coming and we’re running out of space so we could probably get gems to assist in building a few larger structures.”

“I just hate going and getting those permits from the mayor.”

“I know it’ll take a while, but it’ll be worth it. Strange though, doesn’t feel like the government was ever that concerned with what we did with our space before.” Pearl reflected.

They shrugged it off and moved across several other topics. 

“Seems like we’re set for today. Are we still on for later tonight?” Bismuth asked.

“Of course.” Pearl smiled.

Once the day was done and classes were over, they met at the temple later that evening.

“That walk you promised me?” Bismuth teased, grabbing Pearl’s arm and leading her out towards the shore. Bismuth found a comfortable spot near the water and sat down, joined by her partner.

“I like you Pearl.”

“I like you too.”

“I really, really like you. I love you.” Bismuth added and then paused. “Would you prefer I stop saying that? I know we’re not exactly on the same wavelength yet…. I don’t wanna put any pressure on you, but it’s hard for me not to tell you.”

Pearl looked out at the water, “I don’t mind it. It’s nice.” She leaned on Bismuth’s arm.

For a few minutes, they sat in silence, enjoying the sound of the water. The moon’s reflection created beautiful patterns while the waves moved slowly. They were grateful to be where they were with not only themselves but each other. They’d both grown a lot, and while there would still be obstacles to overcome, they were confident that their relationship would stand those tests.

“What if I don’t know what love is?”

“What do you mean?” Bismuth interrogated.

“I wonder sometimes if I was in love with Pink. It was so good, and then it was so bad. Someone who loves you shouldn’t make you feel that way. And how could I love someone if they treated me like that? Was it even love?”

“I don’t know Pearl,” she answered. “But that’s in the past. Sure, it’s something that happened to you, but we can’t let that affect our relationship. This will be better, I promise you.”

“What if I don’t fall in love with you?” 

Bismuth hesitated. She didn’t think that Pearl was incapable of love. She’d seen her love so many people in her lifetime. Not the same kind of love she wanted from Pearl; it was a platonic love. It hadn’t crossed her mind that Pearl might not fall in love with her, that she may never love her the same way Bismuth did. Would that be something she could be okay with? Would she be able to be with Pearl if Pearl never fell in love with her? Bismuth couldn’t say, but she didn’t want to think of it as a possibility.

“Don’t get me wrong,” Pearl added, “I do love you. I care for you deeply. I can’t say that I’m in love with you like you are with me, but you’re so important to me and that’s all that matters right now. I still have my fears.”

“I know,” Bismuth consoled her. A few tears came to her eyes, but she wiped them away, not wanting to take the attention from her significant other. “We’re happy, let’s try not to worry about the past and the future. The present is all we need to think about.”

Pearl took a deep breath. “Thank you for listening to me. You’ve always been so good with that. I feel heard when I’m with you.”

Bismuth wrapped her in closer, putting her worries at bay, and laughed with Pearl. “I could listen to you all day and would never get tired of it.”

They put their faces together, sharing a deep kiss which was shortly followed by a burst of light. Suddenly, Bismuth and Pearl were no longer there.

Instead, taking the place they formerly sat was their fusion, Moonstone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHHH so I drew a little thingy of what Pearl and Bismuth's fusion would look like in this story. Keep in mind I'm not the /best/ artist but I still wanted to do something like this so the 3 people who read this fic could see what I envisioned. Please let me know what you think! More on Moonstone next chapter, which will be updated soon!!!! 
> 
> https://imgur.com/a/QEVek70


	8. Progress is Progress

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three chapters in a week? I'm on a very motivated writing streak right now. Let me know what you think!

Moonstone sat calmly on her spot near the water and took in the surroundings. She peered down at her new form, studying what she could see before standing up. She stood at a little over 8 feet tall, her rainbow hair was pulled back, Bismuth’s traits taking over in that aspect. Her skin was mixed with purple and pink hues, a line separating the two on her face. She was large and muscular but being mixed with Pearl’s physique made her slimmer. Small hoop earrings with dangling stars hung on the sides of her head, reflecting against the water when she looked around. She sported a tight, but comfortable blue jacket with a pair of high-waisted blue pants. But beyond her physical appearance, who was Moonstone?

She was a gem filled with the knowledge of both Pearl’s and Bismuth’s past and present. Suddenly, both gems knew the inner workings of one another. It was an immense amount of information to process but it came to her rapidly upon fusing. Pearl’s emotional and trust issues were clearer than ever, Bismuth’s intentions, love, and dedication to Pearl made Moonstone feel comfortable in who she was and their relationship. Pearl hadn’t thought they were ready to fuse, but the connection they shared while kissing on the beach was undeniable; fusing was unintentional, but Moonstone was happy to exist right now. She didn’t know for how much longer she might remain a fusion but wanted to explore herself even more. 

She awkwardly stumbled into the temple, bending down to fit in the door and hoping that the other gems were too busy in their rooms to notice her. Standing in front of the bathroom mirror, she took a good look at her features. She hunched to get the best possible view. She was so tall that it was necessary, her head would have gone through the ceiling if she was fully upright.

“Pearl is so beautiful; it makes sense that we would look this good.” Moonstone said aloud, followed by a chuckle. Hands ran down her sides, feeling the curves of her body. If Amethyst was here, she would probably call them hot. Admiring herself in the mirror had gone on long enough. It wasn’t like the two of them to be vain (save for Bismuth’s confidence in her crafting skills), but the curiosity of their fusion’s appearance was overwhelming. Of course, they’d thought about what their fusion might be like in the past, but seeing it, and actually being it was more amazing than they’d ever imagined.

The main living space in the temple felt small. Moonstone towered above the couch; her hands were able to reach the beams on the ceiling. Bismuth was used to things being petite to her, but there was an immense difference with this new fusion. Pearl had been taller in other fusions, but Bismuth had always been the same height. She’d never fused with anyone before. It was hard to not want to stay like this forever, but they were both their own gems and knew this was only temporary. 

She wandered around the temple a bit, not knowing what she wanted to do with her new form. It was exciting and strange, but familiar. When she saw the inner temple door open, she cautiously snuck out the front door, not ready just yet to reveal herself to anyone. She didn’t want to risk anybody’s strong reaction that might cause her to un-fuse prematurely. She needed to stay like this a bit longer. Silently making her way back to the water, she pondered what to do next. Inside Moonstone, Pearl felt loved. After feeling unloved for so long, this was thrilling. Doubts were gone, but the minor fear of feeling fragile lingered.

A seagull dove down into the water in front of them, picking up a fish and retreating into the distance. Other seagulls noticed and followed suit, all swooping down with the hopes of grabbing something to eat, but only some were successful. The water stirred as waves continued to crash, voiceless but with a thundering, melodic rhythm. Out over the water, droplets of rain began to fall, coming in with force and suddenly engulfing the fusion in a beautiful storm. She laughed while staring up at the sky and fell backwards into the sand. She couldn’t contain her happiness. There was a deep love inside Moonstone for herself. 

Pearl’s feelings started to take over. Moonstone felt so much self-love, but Pearl’s mind tormented her about her fear of being incapable of falling in love with someone.

They separated.

“Pearl, what’s wrong, what happened?”

“I’m sorry.” She responded between heavy breaths. “I think I was just a little overwhelmed.”

Bismuth leaned over and rubbed a hand on Pearl’s back, comforting her until she felt more stable. The smaller gem felt embarrassed. Moonstone was so happy, and then her insecurities took over causing them to split. “It’s okay. It’s okay. Come here.” Bismuth responded, bringing Pearl closer to her. Pearl was still breathing heavily, but it was slowing down. She rested her head on Bismuth’s lap and started crying. 

Bismuth wiped her tears and stroked her hair, careful not to say the wrong thing. She wanted to give Pearl time to feel her emotions without telling her how she should feel. It was important Pearl processed everything she was going through without interruption.

“Moonstone made me feel so much more confident about your feelings, that our relationship is strong and that you won’t hurt me. I know that I do. I’m so sorry. Right when I feel like things are getting better, it comes back to me. I’ve made so much progress, and I hate moving backwards like this.”

Tears filled Bismuth’s eyes. She didn’t think Pearl was moving backwards at all. She had watched her grow so much since being un-bubbled. She was like the Pearl she used to know, only happier. Having setbacks like this didn’t take away from the overall progress Pearl made, and she hated to think that Pearl felt like having these moments meant that her progress didn’t matter. It did. It mattered so much to Bismuth.

“You’ve come such a long way, Pearl. Don’t discredit everything you’ve been through. We’re going to get through this together.”

Bismuth knew why she and Pearl unfused. She was discouraged even more about Pearl thinking she couldn’t love. With time, she hoped Pearl’s mind might change, but tried not to think about it too much.

“Hey, let’s get you inside and dried off.” Bismuth stood up, taking Pearl’s hand, and helping her up. Pearl was composed now, but still wore a sad look in her eyes. 

When they walked into the temple, Amethyst peered her head out from behind a fridge door. “Yo, you guys look kinda moist.”

“You know I don’t like that word, Amethyst,” Pearl remarked.

“What? You guys were stuck in the rain, that’s all.” She shoved a piece of cake into her mouth and shut the door to the refrigerator while rolling her eyes. “Why didn’t you just warp? Then you wouldn’t be all soggy.”

“We were having a really good time in the rain, weren’t we Bismuth?”

“We were.” She agreed.

“Whatever,” Amethyst said.

Garnet entered the room.

“The moon looked lovely tonight, didn’t it?” She mentioned. Pearl could swear she put some emphasis on the word moon. Did she know?

Bismuth stuttered. “Uh… yeah sure did!” She gave a thumbs up and walked into the bathroom, grabbing a towel and throwing it around Pearl’s shoulders. “Really beautiful.” She and Pearl locked eyes, sharing a small laugh. Even if Garnet knew, she wouldn’t push it after the other day when Pearl mentioned she didn’t want anyone making a big deal out of their relationship. To be fair, Garnet probably did know, and that was okay. 

Pearl cleared her throat. “I want to tell you all something.” She announced.

All eyes turned towards her, even Bismuth was unsure of what she was about to say.

“I’m going to be taking a break from Little Homeschool. And so is Bismuth.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any thoughts on why they're taking a break from Little Homeschool?


	9. Seashell Clock

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter has some mentions of sex in it, this is your warning if you don't want to read it!

“Why? What are you guys doing?” Amethyst asked.

“I would like to know as well.” Bismuth replied, scratching the back of her neck. She was just as confused as the other crystal gems were.

“Bismuth and I are going away for a while. I’m not sure for how long yet. But we need time together, without distractions. I would like to put a proper focus on our relationship.” Pearl stated. 

“Alright! Like a vacation?” Bismuth wondered.

“Sure, like a vacation.” Pearl smiled.

“Heck yes!” She picked up her girlfriend and spun her around, a subtle blush coating her cheeks before she put her back down. “You don’t know how much I could use a break from Little Homeschool.” 

“It’ll be fun.” She cleared her throat. “And that means that you two will be in charge of Little Homeschool for the time being. Do you think you’re up to the task?” She directed her attention towards Garnet and Amethyst. 

“You got it, boss.” Amethyst threw a thumbs up her way.

“Classes might go a little slower, but we should be able to handle it.” Garnet assured, a shine passing over her glasses.

“Great. Bismuth, let’s head to my room in the temple and discuss things.”’

“Yes ma’am.” She responded. They entered Pearl’s room. “So, where are we going?” She asked.

“I’ve already taken the liberty of renting us as an ‘Air B and B’, as the humans call it,” she said with air quotes. “It’s basically a small house where we can spend our time together. I don’t want to be around anyone else right now, just you. I think this will be good for us and our relationship. No distractions.”

Bismuth agreed, “No distractions.”

“I hope you don’t mind that I sprung this on you. I wanted it to be a surprise, I wasn’t planning on announcing it to everyone.”

“No, it’s great. I’m looking forward to it. Do we uh, do we have to pack or something?” Bismuth inquired.

Pearl shook her head. “Oh, no. I’ve got everything we could possibly need in my gem.” She pulled out a lava lamp. “And a wide variety of things that we don’t need.” She laughed and put it back in her gem.

“I don’t know, you never know when you might need a…” she paused, “I actually have no idea what that was.”

“It’s a lava lamp, but no worry. I’ve put some extra necessities away. We can leave first thing in the morning. Until then.” 

Pearl took Bismuth’s hand in hers and pushed some stray strands of hair behind her ear. She guided Bismuth towards the ground, sitting between two waterfalls. Her fingers traced the tattoo on her shoulder, making their way to her chin. Pearl pulled her face closer and kissed her. Soft lips met; their tongues began to move in unison. It was slow at first and innocent, but with increasing intensity as the seconds passed. Neither wanted to stop kissing the other. Pearl smelled fire on Bismuth’s skin: the smell of someone who had been blacksmithing all day. It was comforting and familiar. 

Bismuth’s hand gripped the back of Pearl’s head and didn’t want to let go. Could they ignore all of their future responsibilities and sit here, kissing forever? With light peach hair in her hands, she held onto her as if their lives depended on it. A few minutes passed and they moved away, taking a few deep breaths. 

“I could do that forever,” Pearl said.

“Then don’t stop.” Bismuth replied. They kissed again. And again. 

“I’ll need to breathe eventually.” Pearl laughed. 

“You know we don’t have to breathe.”

“True.” She said. “But I like looking at you too. I can’t see your face when we’re centimeters away from each other.”

“You’ll just have to look at it real hard, so you don’t forget what it looks like the next time we kiss.” Bismuth said.

They spent most of the night kissing, not realizing the sun had already come up.

Their trip to the house Pearl rented only took an hour or so. While they weren’t that far from home, it was far enough that they had their space. They opted to taking a bus over warping, even though there was a warp not too far from them. They enjoyed every moment that was spent together and didn’t see the point in rushing. 

The house was small and had everything a gem could need. A couch, a television, a radio, a kitchen with a kettle in case they wanted to make tea, and other things that they wouldn’t be able to make much use of. But of course, when humans rented this house, they would need the bathroom and bedrooms. Bismuth didn’t think she would find the desire to sleep if she was with Pearl, however.

The house was covered in beachy decorations. A shell clock hung over the door’s entrance, and multiple beach themed pillows covered the small blue couch. A sign by the kitchen read ‘Life’s A Beach!’. They studied their surroundings. So far from a beach but so many beach-related items. It was as though they never left Beach City.

Bismuth picked up a book on a side table next to the couch and flipped through, reading notes from past residents over the years. “Lovely home, can’t wait to come back next year.” She read aloud. “Remind me to write something in here before we leave.”

They settled onto the couch and sat in silence for a couple of moments.

“What do we do now?” Bismuth inquired.

“I don’t know. For once I hadn’t planned much. I figured being with you was more than enough to do.”

“You’re right, but you can’t very well do me for the next few weeks.” Bismuth grinned.

“Bismuth! You know I don’t mean it like that.” Pearl blushed.

“I’m only joking Pearl; gems can’t very well do that anyway. I mean, right?”

Tension filled the space between them, both declining to speak.

“I mean, technically… yes,” Pearl said after some time. “It’s not really in our nature though. I would say fusion is the closest thing to that, right? However, Greg and Pink did… I’m sorry, is it hot in here? I’m going to open that window.”

She stumbled to the closest window and struggled to open it. Her finger stroked her chin and she moved on to the next window, failing to open that as well.

“Are all the windows in this house decorative? It doesn’t seem that any of them want to open. I’m going to be adding that to the review.” Pearl said.

“Let me give it a try.” 

Bismuth gripped the bottom of the window and pried it open. They both heard a loud crack.

“I broke it, didn’t I?” She stepped away.

“Well, it’s definitely open now.” Pearl laughed.

“So uh, how exactly did Pink and Greg have Steven? We don’t really have the organs to do that. I never really thought about the logic behind it.” Bismuth questioned.

Pearl looked slightly embarrassed. Thinking about Greg and Pink first announcing the fact that a gem had a growing human-gem hybrid inside of her was a strange and unfamiliar concept. Creating life wasn’t something gems could do together.

“Pink shapeshifted and created human internal organs to create Steven. She made a reproductive system that allowed her to grow him. It’s very odd, it had never been heard of before in any type of gem history. Our bodies are made of light and mimic the human form. We don’t naturally have internal organs. Our external bodies look similar but do not serve the same purpose unless we want them to. Besides of course creating a new life.”

Bismuth shifted back and forth on the couch.

“Did you and Pink ever do what Greg and Pink did?”

Pearl’s gaze averted elsewhere. “Do you mean… the act they did to create Steven?”

“Yes.” She replied, but she wasn’t exactly sure she wanted to hear the answer.

“Without the intention of creating life… yes,” Pearl admitted.

Bismuth didn’t know how to respond. She wasn’t even sure what that meant but pressed on anyway. “What was it like?”

“Different. A bit like fusion but, probably the closest that humans get to fusion. It was at least a couple of hundred years ago and only happened twice. It wasn’t bad, just different.”

“Oh.” Bismuth replied.

“Yeah.”

“I didn’t mean to pry into your past so much. Curiosity got the best of me, I guess.”

“It’s alright,” Pearl said. Only about an hour into getting to their temporary house but things were off to an awkward start. “I’m not sure if I would do it again. But, curiosity, right?” 

They shared an uncomfortable laugh. Bismuth didn’t know if that was something she wanted to do, but a bit of jealousy crept up on her knowing it was something that Pink and Pearl did.

“I wasn’t trying to ask if you wanted to do that with me I-.”

“N-no I know,” Pearl stuttered.

“I wouldn’t even know how.” 

“I’ve done it, and I’m not sure I know how it all works either.” Pearl added.

“I have to admit though, it does make me a little jealous.” Bismuth admitted.

“Bismuth. I think I like you more than I ever liked her. You have no reason to be jealous.”

“Thanks, Pearl.” She responded quietly.

Did Bismuth think about what a sexual act with Pearl might be like? A small bit of her was curious. She was curious about what she and Pink shared. It was hard for her to picture it. She wanted to know more, but she didn’t at the same time. It was foreign and confusing and being with Pearl was still new to her.

“Would you like to put something on the television?” Pearl suggested.

“Sounds good to me!” They were both happy to change the subject.

They watched some local news programs as well as an episode of a sitcom they’d never heard of. It was mostly on in the background while they made conversation about what this weekend would be for them. The sun was going down, and quickly it was fully dark outside.

“I hope I didn’t make things weird before.” Bismuth said.

“Not at all, Bismuth. I kind of forgot what happened between Pink and I even happened. I guess I blocked it out.”

“Fair enough.” She replied.

“Hey, would you like to go somewhere with me?”

“Aren’t we already somewhere?” Bismuth laughed.

“Come on,” Pearl said. She took Bismuth’s hand and lead her out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahhh i hope that wasn't too awkward. to be honest, i'm not sure if I would want pearl and bismuth to do the do in this story. i think it's an interesting concept but don't want to lose any readers who aren't interested in that. also, I'm not sure if it would be in character in this particular story for them to do that. however, if I do, it wouldn't really be in detail it would just be mentioned. what do you guys think?


	10. Cotton Candy

“It’s not a beach, but it’s beautiful right?”

“It sure is something.” Bismuth smiled.

Before them was a large, open lake. Though it was dark outside, silhouettes of mountains rested in the distance. The moon’s reflection showed off the beautiful dark blue color of the natural lake. A small island sat in the middle, covered with trees. A wooden bridge stood in front of them that led to the island. Bismuth grabbed Pearl’s hand and stepped onto the bridge. They walked over it slowly, playfully joking around with each other on the stroll. Fireflies danced back and forth over the water, passing in front of them occasionally.

As they neared the tiny island, the sound of crickets became louder, like an orchestra’s crescendo. Pearl’s hand trailed occasionally on the railing, avoiding the cracks as to not get a splinter. She distracted herself, looking out at the water. It was lovely and peaceful. As it was around 11 at night, they didn’t expect to find themselves coming into contact with anyone. The first steps on the island flooded them with a sense of comfort.

Pearl and Bismuth interlocked fingers. 

“How did you find out about this?” Bismuth asked.

Pearl’s gem glowed and out of it came a map marked with local spots around the area. “I found this in a drawer in the house. I checked it when you were looking under the couch for that marble you lost.”

“Hey!” Bismuth interjected, “How are we supposed to play mancala without those little glass beads?”

“Fair point.” She laughed. “I didn’t know what to expect, but it’s better than I could have imagined.” 

“Agreed.” Bismuth added.

A raccoon climbing down a tree caught Pearl’s attention. “Oh Bismuth, look! How cute.” She pointed excitedly to the animal. “Don’t get too close though, those creatures can bite.”

“But I was watching this video of one the other day. It was eating cotton candy and it tried to clean it off in some water. The cotton candy melted, and it looked so sad. How could something so cute be evil?” Bismuth asked.

“First off, I’m going to need you to send me that video. And second, let’s watch from a distance. We wouldn’t want to disturb him in his little habitat.”

“True.” Bismuth agreed.

A gust of wind hit and sent her rainbow hair flying across her face. She tried to move the strands out of the way and noticed Pearl staring at her. Pearl blushed and looked downwards. Her hands awkwardly played with one another.

“What?” Bismuth laughed. She was still trying to fix her hair.

“Nothing,” Pearl said quietly. Her and Bismuth’s fingers slowly let go of one another. 

“Is everything okay?” Bismuth asked.

“Of course,” Pearl said, but seemed unsure that the words she was saying were true. 

“You can tell me if somethings wrong, you know.”

“Not at all, I’m having a lovely time. You’re making me feel things I didn’t think I could feel again.”

“Oh.” Bismuth responded, surprised. “How would you describe these feelings?” 

“I’m not sure.”

Bismuth didn’t know what to say next. Pearl wasn’t being completely honest, but she wouldn’t push Pearl to say anything that she wasn’t comfortable with. Pearl was her own gem, and if she wanted to say something, she was going to say it. Forcing her to would only drive her further away, and that was the last thing that Bismuth wanted. She knew when Pearl was withholding some words, however, and dwelled on the thought for a bit before moving on.

“Do you remember the night that we went roller skating?” Bismuth asked, taking her mind away from her worries.

“How could I forget it?” Pearl smiled.

“That was the night I was sure that I wanted to be with you. That I was in love with you. Thousands of years ago, I felt love for you, but I wasn’t in love with you. While I was excited to meet your friends and experience a night with humans, I went there for you. I hadn’t seen you that happy in a while. I want to make you that happy all the time.”

“You make me so happy, Bismuth,” Pearl said.

“I’m going to make you happy forever. You know that, right?”

“I believe you.” This was true, Pearl did believe that Bismuth intended to make her happy. Whether her fear for falling for another gem would hold her back or not was something she didn’t know, she did know that she wanted to try and let go of that fear. With Bismuth, she thought, things would be different.

They looked up as another gust of wind passed by. Pearl looked through the trees and towards the sky. Her gaze shifted towards clouds passing in front of the stars. 

A few moments of silence lingered between them when Bismuth decided to delve deeper into the island. “Do you hear that?” She asked.

“I don’t hear anything,” Pearl said, raising an eyebrow. She listened more closely and followed Bismuth’s lead.

Bismuth rushed towards the sound of an animal whimpering. She looked at the nearest tree and saw the same raccoon before lying at the bottom, very still. The pair approached it cautiously. It appeared as though the animal had fallen from the tree. A tinge of bright red blood was present near its front leg.

“I think he’s hurt.” Bismuth sounded worried.

Pearl’s gem glowed again, and she produced a small vial. Filled with it was Steven’s essence. She took a few steps closer to the animal and let a couple of drops fall. The animal remained still for a moment before twitching and standing up. It locked eyes with Pearl, seemingly thanking her before scurrying off into the darkness.

“You’re incredible.” Bismuth gushed.

“We have Steven to thank for this. Even when he’s not here, he’s still healing beings.” She thought about Steven every day. It had been hard for her to be without him for so long but felt happy knowing that he was exploring the world and learning to be his own person. Pearl dusted off her shoulders and stood up, joining hands with Bismuth again. They kissed and parted. “Follow me.”

“Where to now?” She asked.

Pearl removed her jacket and headed towards the water. She smiled and jumped in, fully submerging herself. Bismuth laughed and jumped in as well. The water was cold but refreshing. They splashed each other back and forth. Pearl’s normally put together hair hung flat on the sides of her face. She spit water and a leaf from her mouth. Her eyes widened, surprised for a moment before bursting into laughter. When was the last time she was with carefree? Bismuth couldn’t recall, but seeing Pearl like this was invigorating. How she longed to see Pearl smiling and laughing. She wanted to be the reason for it.

Bismuth’s hair covered her face again as well, this time soaked with water. “Hey, how do we know this lake isn’t filled with killer fish?”

“Don’t you remember the gem war? I’m sure we could handle some fish,” Pearl reassured her. “Also, this lake is perfectly safe for swimmers. It says so in the brochure.”

“Ah, you and your logic. Leave it to you to research the lake before we visit it.”

Bismuth wrapped her arms around Pearl, pulling her in closer. Their foreheads touched. They both wanted to kiss but remained in the moment for as long as possible. Something about the way they were situated felt even more intimate than a kiss. Neither gem conceded as they stayed like that for what felt like hours, while in reality, it was only a couple of minutes.

“Bismuth?”

“Yeah?”

“I think I’m falling in love with you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FRICK IS IT FINALLY HAPPENING IS PEARL REALLY FALLING IN LOVE WITH BISMUTH? 
> 
> I also loved everyone's feedback last chapter it made me so freaking happy that I got so many comments and would love to continue and hear feedback throughout if you have a few moments to spare <3 thank u guys for supporting this story. I've still got some more in store, I've taken all the comments from last week into deep consideration ;)


	11. Houses Alone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fun fact, I wrote this chapter a couple of hours after I wrote the last one. I was gonna post it earlier today but I've been making tik toks all morning responding to hate comments on a video I made about how I was unemployed. if anybody wants some free entertainment, check out my tik tok @thatfakelesbian

Bismuth started crying. Tears flowed down her face while she held Pearl in as tightly as she possibly could without hurting the smaller gem. Pearl couldn’t help but cry at the sight of Bismuth’s tears. She felt free and open. These feelings were different than they were with Pink. So different, in fact, that she knew that this had to be love. Bismuth loved her for her, she accepted all parts of her and wasn’t selfish. While it’s good to be selfish from time to time when it starts hurting the people around you it does more harm than good. With Bismuth, she recognized they were equal, not as though one of them was superior.

“Pearl! Do you mean that?” Bismuth asked happily through tears.

Pearl’s hand rested on Bismuth’s cheek. She soothed her and wiped some tears away, staring longingly into her eyes. She paused for a moment and took a deep breath. “There are no other words that can describe this feeling. It’s love. I know it.” A weight was lifted off her shoulders. 

Bismuth sighed with relief as her tears slowed down.

“I love you so much, Pearl. My god, hearing you say that. Wow. I love you. Damn!”

Pearl’s eyes widened and she blushed. “I’ve never heard you cuss before.”

“I’m excited!” She lowered her voice. “But that was my first time, was it obvious?”

Pearl closed her eyes and smiled. “Let’s head back to the house.”

The house was quiet in comparison to the lake. The sound of crickets could still be heard in the distance, but the loudest thing was the music coming from the neighbor’s house. Their feet squeaked with water as they made their way inside. 

“We probably shouldn’t sit on the couches while we’re all wet. I think I’ll rinse off in the shower. I’m pretty sure there are leaves in my shirt.” Pearl said.

“I’ll get some tea going, and then we can watch that horror movie you were talking about. What was it called again? Houses alone?” Bismuth asked.

“Home Alone.” Pearl laughed. “And it’s actually a holiday movie, it’s not scary at all.”

“I don’t know. A kid alone in a house while people try to break in? That sounds pretty scary to me. Not all kids have gem weapons.”

“He makes do.” Pearl giggled. “The young boy in the movie kind of reminds me of Steven when he was younger. I think you’ll like it.”

“Sounds good to me!” Bismuth said.

“So, I’ll shower, and be back shortly then…” Pearl trailed off, taking a few slow steps towards the bathroom. She avoided eye contact for a bit and then looked at Bismuth.

“Got it.”

“Have you been in that bathroom? The shower is huge.” She awkwardly laughed, leaning against the door frame.

“No, I haven’t seen it yet, I’ll have to check it out when you’re finished.” Bismuth filled up the kettle with water and placed it on a burner. She crossed her arms and turned to Pearl, who was still waiting next to the bathroom door. A light blue blush coated her cheeks. Pearl’s gaze remained downwards. She sometimes struggled with saying exactly what she needed to say. “Everything alright?”

Pearl looked back up and said yes, heading into the bathroom and shutting the door behind her. She slunk down against the closed door and threw her head into her lap. She was so embarrassed. Pearl didn’t really feel like she needed to shower, she just wanted to share another intimate moment with Bismuth. 

‘What’s with me today?’ Pearl thought. ‘Just earlier the thought of physical intimacy beyond hugging and kissing gave me little interest, and now I’m trying to get Bismuth to shower with me?’ She turned on the shower and removed her clothing, sitting at the bottom of the tub. ‘At this rate, Bismuth is going to be the one who’s doubting me.’ 

Fear moved to the forefront of her mind again, for the first time in a few days. Feeling this vulnerable was strange. Were things moving too quickly? Minutes passed and she felt no desire to move from her place in the tub. She didn’t want to take too long and raise any suspicions that there was something wrong. A knock on the door startled her into standing up.

“I’m almost finished!” Pearl exclaimed.

“Are you okay in there, Pearl? I don’t know how long showers are supposed to last, but it feels like it’s been a while.”

Pearl’s eyes caught the seashell clock that was identical to the one in their main living space, noting that she had been in there for over half an hour.

“I’m okay, sorry. I’ll be out in a minute.” She grabbed a towel and dried herself off, putting her clothes back on. She resumed space in the living room.

Bismuth stood by the stovetop with an eyebrow raised. “I’m not too great at making tea. I think I kept it on for too long.” She opened the top of the kettle, revealing an empty container. All the water had evaporated.

“It’s okay,” Pearl reassured her. “I’m not really in the mood for tea anyway.”

“Was the water pressure alright? You were in there for a while. I don’t really know how showers are supposed to work, but Amethyst always complains about the water pressure in the temple’s shower.”

“It was fine.”

“What’s up Pearl? I don’t want to push you but, you can talk to me if there’s something wrong.”

“I just, I don’t know.” Pearl sighed and fell onto the couch. “I wanted you to come in the shower with me before.”

“Oh?” Bismuth asked. “Sorry, I’m not always the most perceptive with some things. But wait, why would we go in the shower together?” 

“Humans generally shower without clothes on. I was feeling a little… I don’t know what I was feeling.” She admitted.

“Oh…” Bismuth realized. “But I thought you didn’t want-.” Pearl stopped her.

“I know, I mean, I don’t know what I want, really. I just want to be close to you.” Pearl’s eyes filled with tears again.

“Pearl… come on. It’s okay. With love, your feelings don’t always make sense. If I knew that’s what you wanted, I would have come with you. Don’t cry, please. I know it’s confusing, but it’s okay.” 

Pearl stood up and walked out the front door onto a small balcony. She leaned against the railing and stared at the house across the street. A few humans were gathered by a fire pit roasting marshmallows and sharing drinks. They laughed and danced to loud music. Pearl longed to look as happy as they did right now.

Bismuth joined her, leaning over the railing as well. It creaked loudly under her body weight. Fearful it may crack underneath her, she opted to sit on the ground next to Pearl. She pressed her face onto the side of her leg and rubbed a gentle hand on her. 

“What are you feeling right now?” Bismuth asked.

“Confusion,” Pearl stated. “I started wanting something that I didn’t think I wanted. I feel like I’m going against my own desires. That doesn’t even make sense, does it?” She laughed.

“It doesn’t have to.” 

“Where do we go from here?” Pearl wondered.

“Uh, I mean, back into the shower, right?” Bismuth said, half-joking. Pearl playfully pushed her head away. “I’m kidding. We take it one step at a time. This is new to both of us. It doesn’t have to be easy at first. That’s why we’re out here. That’s why we’re spending this time alone. After this, it’ll be easier. We just need to find out how.”

Pearl was tired of feeling like she wasn’t being her complete self with her partner. She was exhausted and furious at Pink for doing this to her. When she started to feel excitement and happiness, fear lurked around the corner. But what good did that do? Why should she allow Pink to have this much control over her current state? Bismuth’s relationship with her meant something. She was ready to fully release herself from the grips that her past held on her. She felt empowered. She was lovable. Bismuth reminded her of that. She was worthy of happiness. She was worthy of love. Bismuth brightened every moment and never made her doubt herself.

“I’m ready to find out how.”

“Me too. But I’m okay with things not being exactly perfect right now. That’s what this is all about. Figuring each other out, how things work.”

Pearl narrowed her eyes at the humans across the street. One looked up around the same moment and stared back at them. 

“Is that Steven?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> STEVEN?! SIR WHAT ARE YOU DOING OVER THERE?!
> 
> I have the next chapter written and if a few people read this quickly and comment I'll probably upload it tomorrow or the next day!!! I don't want to upload too quickly and I wanna give people time to read it n stuff but yeah. idk. I'm writing chapter 13 already cause I'm very invested in this story, and I'm probably gonna have a little less time once school starts in a week so I'm trying to write as much as I can to get ahead of it


	12. "Soda" by the Fire

“Hey Pearl! And… Bismuth?” Steven exclaimed. He muttered a few words to his friends before making his way to the pair. “What are you guys doing here? This is crazy!” He hugged both gems and sat on a nearby wooden porch chair. It had been a couple of months since any of the Crystal Gems had seen him, and he appeared to have grown an inch or two.

“Steven, I can’t believe you’re here. This is a crazy coincidence.” Pearl said.

“Who else is here with you guys? Amethyst? Garnet? Are they inside?”

Bismuth cleared her throat and scratched the back of her neck, closing her eyes. “No actually, it’s just the two of us.”

Steven’s eyes widened and he placed both of his hands over his mouth. “Does that mean…?”

Bismuth looked to Pearl, giving her the decision to tell Steven or not. 

“It does,” Pearl said. She smiled and took Bismuth’s hand, holding it up for Steven to see.

“Oh my god. I knew it. I knew it would happen. I’m so happy! Ahhhh! So, are you guys on vacation or something?”

“We thought it would be nice to spend a little time together, away from work. And wait. What do you mean you knew it would happen?” Pearl asked.

Bismuth leaned back and forth and laughed. “Uh, yeah, I may have given Steven the hint that I had feelings for you a little while back.” 

“I really can’t believe this. Hey, follow me over here! I wanna introduce you to my friends.” He led them across the street to the firepit. His friends waved. “This is Ronnie,” he said pointing to a young adult with a full beard, glasses, and a beanie. “I met him at an improv show I caught in Jersey. He was doing this really hilarious bit about- you know, you actually had to be there for it.” He laughed and pointed to another girl, average height with waist-length curly hair, sporting an outfit that made her look like a modern-day hippie. “And this is Carrie.” Carrie held up her drink and smiled. “Carrie helped me out a local animal hospital when I found a stray dog injured on the street.” 

Pearl and Bismuth waved back.

“And this is Pearl, she’s basically like my mom. I mean, she’s nothing like my actual mom. My actual mom is kind of crazy. But she practically raised me. She’s awesome. And this is Bismuth. Bismuth is a really cool blacksmith, and she’s also uh, she’s Pearl’s girlfriend.”

Carrie spoke first. “Woah, are you guys like, the gems Steven was telling us about?”

“Guilty.” Bismuth laughed and raised her hand.

“So, do you guys have powers or….? I mean what’s the deal with that? Steven says you guys all have powers. He says he has them too, but he hasn’t shown us. Kinda suspicious if you ask me.” Ronnie said.

“I do have powers!” Steven yelled. “I’m trying out being a normal teenager. I haven’t needed them. But if you really want to see.” Steven took a step back and closed his eyes. He made his shield appear for a moment before putting it away.

“DUDE!” Carrie screamed. She dropped her drink and stared, mouth wide open. “That’s so rad; I honestly thought you were just messing with us.” 

“Impressive,” Ronnie added. “I wasn’t expecting that.”

Carrie bent down and picked up her drink, though most of it had spilled on the ground. She took a swig and clapped. “What about you guys? What do you do?”

Steven laughed and helped Carrie wipe some spilled drink off of her pants. 

“Pretty much the same stuff as Steven.” Pearl pulled a roll of toilet paper out of her gem. “Here, don’t use it all in one place.” She winked and attempted to do finger guns. 

Steven rolled his eyes playfully and grabbed the roll of toilet paper from her hand. “Thanks, Pearl.”

“I mean, we were running low on this. Somebody used a bunch of it the other day.” Ronnie directed his attention towards Steven.

“Hey! Those steamed vegetables don’t sit well with me for whatever reason. Doesn’t stop me from eating them all the time though.” He muttered the last sentence quietly under his breath.

“So,” Bismuth started, “What brings you guys out here?”

“This is my uncle’s vacation house,” Carrie gestured behind them, “I know where the key is, so I come hang out here every once and a while. I’m pretty sure he knows I’m here, anyway. It’s cool.”

“What are you guys doing up so late?” Pearl questioned. She loved to see Steven doing his thing and being his own person, but her care for him still lingered.

“Well, this mostly,” Steven said, looking at the fire pit. “We were having a few drinks…” he cleared his throat “of this soda, and time slipped away I guess.”

“Ah soda,” Pearl said, confidently. She pushed up the collar of her jacket. “I’ve been known to drink some soda in my day. Why don’t you toss me one of those bad boys?” Clearly uncomfortable with how her jacket was touching her neck, she quickly pushed it back down, shaking her head back and forth. 

“Uh, I don’t think you want any of this.” Steven turned to his friends and giggled. “It’s not very good.”

“I like soda! Well, I’ve never had it before, but if it’s anything like tea, I’m sure I would enjoy it.” Bismuth argued.

“It’s definitely not like tea,” Ronnie said.

“Either way,” Bismuth dismissed them, “I’m all for trying new things. We’ll both take one soda please.”

“Have they had-?” Carrie started.

“It’s alcohol,” Steven admitted.

“Steven!” Pearl exclaimed. “You’re drinking alcohol?!”

“It’s not a big deal!” Steven attempted to reassure her. “I’ve only had a few, and it’s not like I’m driving anywhere tonight.”

“Alright, alright.” Pearl took a few breaths and calmed herself down. “Please be safe. You’re still young.”

“Don’t worry, Pearl. It’s not a regular thing, I’m just having a good time with my friends.”

“Uh….” Bismuth spoke, “What’s alcohol?”

Ronnie sat up excitedly in his seat. “How do you explain alcohol to somebody from another planet?” He was ready to try but Pearl started first.

“Beverages that make you intoxicated. They don’t work on gems the same way they do with humans. It takes significantly more. I’ve never tried them myself, but Rose, ahem, Pink relayed the experience to me when she first met Greg. They used to partake occasionally.”

“Alright, alright,” Steven interrupted them. “I think I’m ready to call it quits for the night. I’m going to sleep.” Pearl could tell that the mention of his mother for a second time that night made him uncomfortable. She wanted to apologize but instead hugged Steven and asked him to stop by in the morning. He agreed, and the group parted ways. 

“Sorry if that was awkward.” Steven could be heard saying to his friends as they entered their house.

Pearl and Bismuth made their way inside once again.

“Do you think he’s upset with me?” Pearl asked when she sat on the couch.

“No, no. Don’t stress about it. It was a weird situation. He’s out here to get away, and so are we. We can talk to him about it in the morning if you’re still worried tomorrow.”

“Okay,” Pearl relaxed.

“How about that movie?”

“I love you, Bismuth.” Pearl turned to her significant other and settled into her shoulder.

Bismuth cupped Pearl’s face in her hand. “What was that for?”

“You make everything better. It’s so easy with you. Anytime I’m stressed, you ease my worries. You help me look at things from a new perspective. I’m really grateful for you. Telling you that I love you sums up all of those feelings.”

“I love you too.” Bismuth responded. “So, was that a yes or no for the movie?”

“I have a better idea.”

“Yeah, what’s that?” Bismuth asked.

“Would you want to go into the bedroom with me for a little bit?”

“Sure, I haven’t actually had time to tour this whole house yet.”

“Bismuth.”

“What? What’s wrong?”

“The bedroom is where humans go when they… uh… you know.” Pearl stuttered. 

“Oh! Uh… I’m not sure that I, well, I mean I do but…”

“If you don’t want to, we don’t have to. But I want to. I really do. So, if you want to then, we could try, maybe?”

“Okay, so we’re doing this then.” Bismuth stated.

They sat on the couch with a few inches of space between them, neither of them wanting to make the first move. It seemed like the distance between them increased with each second that passed.

Bismuth could hear Pearl quietly saying something under her breath.

“What’s that?” Bismuth asked.

“Taking control of my life, not being afraid to do things. Basically, along those lines. You’re my girlfriend. I have no reason to be afraid of new experiences with you. Come on, let’s go.”

Pearl stood up and extended her hand to Bismuth who willingly took it and trailed after Pearl into the master bedroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope u guys liked this one! so fun fact, ronnie is my boyfriend and carrie is my roommate! we all live together and they also love steven universe so I thought it would be fun to include them in this chapter. this is the only chapter they'll be in but I thought it was fitting to have my fellow friends and steven universe lovers be apart of this little story I've created.
> 
> also, I've been writing a bunch of bispeal one-shots recently so check them out if you're interested! I'll definitely be doing more over the next few weeks. this story isn't over yet, but its a little over halfway through. I'm aiming for around 20 chapters in total. after that, I plan on either writing a sequel or a whole other story! any ideas or feedback is always appreciated. <3


	13. Risky Bismuth and... Pearl?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUYS FAIR WARNING THIS CHAPTER HAS SEX
> 
> i took the comments of everybody into consideration so yes there is a sex scene, and while its detailed its not superrrrrrr detailed so yeah. if you don't want to read it wait a few days for the next chapter! there is nothing plotline that you'll miss besides a couple lines at the very end if you want to skip it!!

Bismuth sat on the edge of the bed. Even though they were alone, Pearl shut the door behind them. It’s not as though they thought anybody would come in, but she knew the act would feel more private in an enclosed space.

“I really don’t know anything at all about this. I don’t want it to be bad for you.” Bismuth admitted. She shifted her weight around awkwardly.

“Bismuth, like I said previously, I hardly know what I’m doing either. As long as it’s you with me, it couldn’t possibly be bad.” Pearl pulled Bismuth in closely. “A lot of it is figuring each other out during it. Kind of like you said yesterday. It’s similar to a relationship, in that sense.”

Bismuth intertwined her fingers with Pearl’s. “Is it okay that I’m nervous?”

“Of course; I am as well. That’s part of it.”

Pearl took the lead, pulling Bismuth in for a deep kiss. Their lips pressed together lightly as first, and then with more intensity. What started as a simple kiss turned into a fight for dominance with their tongues. Pearl moved onto Bismuth’s lap, her hands moving to the back of her head. She gripped a fistful of her hair forcefully, pulling her head back and gradually making her way to her neck. Her tongue grazed her neck, biting softly. A quiet moan escaped Bismuth’s mouth.

“Oh uh, sorry about that. I don’t know where that came from. I’ve never made that noise before.” Bismuth apologized.

Pearl held up a finger to Bismuth’s lips and spoke between kisses. “That just means it feels good.”

Bismuth tensed her fingers and then allowed herself to relax. Pearl pushed her down on the bed, straddling her body and continuing to kiss her. Suddenly, they fused. This fusion didn’t last long, though. They quickly unfused.

“Sorry, uh, sorry I’m just nervous I think.” Bismuth said shyly.

“It’s okay. Relax.” Pearl pressed on.

“My god, Pearl, I love you so much.” She moaned again.

Bismuth leaned into a pillow and turned her face to the side, biting her own lip. Pearl broke contact and slid her fingers to the bottom hem of her shirt, finding her way underneath it and upwards. She toyed with her chest, using her other hand to remove Bismuth’s shirt. Gems had the same external body parts as humans, so she mostly knew her way around a typical female body type. Bismuth let out an even louder groan and melted into the bed. She traced her fingers around, then moving her mouth to replace her hand. 

Bismuth gripped Pearl’s hip, grinding into the larger gem. She flipped Pearl around so that Bismuth was on top. She mimicked Pearl’s motions, kissing her neck, and then removing her top and connecting her mouth to her chest. Pearl’s body was warm. Now it was Pearl who was moaning at Bismuth’s arousing touches.

“I really like hearing you make those noises.” Bismuth laughed.

“Then don’t stop,” Pearl begged.

“My pleasure.” Bismuth agreed.

Bismuth moved down and began to remove Pearl’s shorts. Bismuth paused.

“I’m not sure what to do, I, I want it to be okay.”

“Do what feels right,” Pearl stated through scattered breaths.

Bismuth brought her hands to Pearl’s lower half. She moved up and kissed her again while she played with Pearl. Her left hand was between her lower legs, while her right hand was behind her head. She left a trail of gentle but passionate kisses on Pearl’s neck while pleasing her lower half. Pearl writhed in pleasure, moaning louder with each moment that passed. 

“Does it feel okay?” Bismuth asked, somewhat nervously.

“Yes, oh, it feels incredible.”

Bismuth continued making circles with her finger, noting what movements caused the most reaction from Pearl. She felt something coming over her, so replaced her hand with her mouth. This was so new to her; she still was unsure if she was doing it right but didn’t stop. Pearl's thighs tightened around Bismuth’s head, the pressure increasing. Her tongue was getting a full workout, but she didn’t tire knowing that Pearl felt good.

“Please don’t stop.” Pearl’s hands grabbed tightly onto Bismuth’s hair. She was almost reaching a point of complete ecstasy. Just another minute or so, no, maybe just seconds. She thought her legs may crush Bismuth’s head, but she couldn’t control herself. Pearl let her head dig into the pillow once more, letting a loud, breathy moan escape her lips. 

Bismuth looked up at Pearl. Her arms were over her head as she took a few seconds to catch her breath.

“Are you sure that you haven’t done this before?”

“I swear. Is that a good thing?”

“Why don’t I let you decide that for yourself?”

Pearl took control of Bismuth with her mouth. While Pink and she had participated in the act in the past, she never brought her to completion. It always felt good, but she wasn’t in a place in the past where she could fully relax as she did with Bismuth. She wanted Bismuth to know what it felt like having just experienced it herself. Pearl incorporated her fingers into the mix, entering Bismuth carefully but with ease. Bismuth gripped onto the bedsheets behind her, unable to cease her continuous deep moans. Tingles traveled through her body.

She rubbed Pearl’s skin delicately, grabbing tightly onto her arm when she hit a particularly sensitive pleasure spot.

“Oh, god, oh, Pearl. Right there feels really good.”

Pearl kept up with the motion. Bismuth didn’t attempt to wipe away the beads of sweat that were forming on her forehead. Being much physically stronger than Pearl, she tried not to move in any way that might hurt her but found it nearly impossible to remain still in the slightest while Pearl pleased her. Her face was completely flush, it felt like it was blazing with the warmth that emitted from her. The room was smaller than it was before, wasn’t it? Almost like it was closing in, when suddenly…

She sat up halfway, her arms leaned back behind her while she tried to process what had just occurred in her body.

“Pearl.” She fell backward onto the pillow again. “What was that? It was like my whole body, it started in my… and then I could feel it everywhere. Is that what I just did to you?” She asked. Pearl worked her way up to Bismuth’s face and kissed her. She settled in next to her and rested her head on Bismuth’s chest.

“Pretty incredible, right?”

“Uh yeah!” Bismuth exclaimed. “That’s one way to describe it.”

Pearl laughed and looked up at her girlfriend. “Thank you. I didn’t think it could be that good.”

“What? I mean, didn’t you say you’ve done this before?”

“Yes, but it was never like that. I never reached that point. That made all the difference. Also, I’m in love with you, so it was significantly more meaningful.”

Bismuth shifted onto her side and propped her head up with a bent arm. “Do you really think that you weren’t in love with Pink?”

Pearl’s eyes widened while she pondered the question. She thought about it briefly. As of recently, she decided that her feelings towards Pink stemmed from admiration, and a desire to be perfect. 

“No, I don’t think so. It could have been love, sure. But was I really in love with her? No. I can say that confidently, at the very least.”

Bismuth smiled and kissed Pearl’s forehead. It didn’t matter if she had feelings for someone else before, because Pearl was with her now. That surpassed everything.

“Do you know if any of the other Crystal Gems have done anything like this?”

Pearl laughed. “Well, you know Amethyst. She’s practically an immortal human. She will do anything to get the human experience. And I know something was going on with Vidalia back in the day. She never outright admitted it, but you could tell by the way she spoke about her. Ruby and Sapphire did for the first time not too long ago, actually. It didn’t cross their mind until Greg came around. Rose shared a lot of information with us after Steven was conceived. Curiosity truly is something that entices both humans and gems.”

Bismuth chewed on one of her fingers.

“I hope it’s not too soon to ask, but can we maybe do that again?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pls lmk if this was awkward!! i rly wanted it to be steamy but also cute and lovey so definitely lmk what u think!!! :3


	14. Falling

Both gems were determined to stay up all night after a second act of lovemaking. However, after such a human moment, human sleepiness caught up with them. Pearl fell asleep in Bismuth’s arms. They didn’t sleep for long, just enough to energize them for the morning. They slept completely bare; bodies pressed against one another. It was around 11 am when a knock on the front door got them out of bed. They threw their clothing back on hastily. Pearl hadn’t had much time to think about what happened with Steven and his friend’s the prior evening. The events with Bismuth were her main focus, but it came back to her when she was met with Steven’s face.

“Steven! I’m glad you’re here.” Pearl stepped aside to let him enter. “I wanted to apologize for last night. I didn’t mean to embarrass you in front of your friends. And I know I shouldn’t have brought up Pink.”

Steven waved his hand in front of him and shook his head. “No, you’re totally fine, Pearl. I brought her up first, anyway. I was tired, I haven’t been up that late in a while. Just a little agitated, but that’s not your fault. My therapist has helped me process dealing with my past trauma, so stepping away from it and dealing with it alone in a healthy way has been working for me. That’s all. I didn’t mean to be rude or cut our time short.”

“Not at all, I’m very happy to see you, no matter the length of time.”

“Me too. Aww, come here.”

Pearl grabbed Steven without a moment’s hesitation and pulled him in for a tight hug. 

“Bismuth, you too.” He insisted, gesturing towards them.

Bismuth stepped over and wrapped her large arms around the pair. She fully encircled both of them with her width. “I missed you too, kid. It’s not the same at Little Homeschool without you!”

Steven stepped back and scanned his surroundings. “So, what’re you guys up to today? This is a nice little place you got here.” He looked Pearl up and down, stopping at her feet. “Uh, Pearl? Why do you only have one shoe on?”

“Oh, how strange!” Pearl said, robotically. “It must have fallen off when I was cleaning!” She scurried away into the bedroom and shut the door quickly behind her.

Steven raised an inquisitive eyebrow at Bismuth once Pearl was out of sight. “What’s her deal?”

“Pearl? She’s always like that. It’s been a while since you’ve seen her, that’s all.” She claimed.

“Bismuth. Your shirt is on backwards.” Steven pointed out.

“No-no.” She stammered. “It’s reversible. I always wear it like this.”

“Do you also wear it with the tag sticking out?” Steven contested.

“That’s the style! Pearl introduced me to it.”

Pearl re-entered the living room with both shoes on. “How odd, I was trying to dust under the bed. My shoe must’ve got caught on the bed frame. It was lying right there, silly me.”

“You know, I’m not 13 anymore.” Steven pushed.

“Alright! Steven…” Pearl wailed. “I’m not very good at lying.”

“Sooooo,” Steven teetered on the tips of his feet. “You guys totally did it.”

Bismuth smiled coyly and let out a burst of laughter. “We did. It was great.”

“I wanna know everything! No, I lied. I want to know nothing. I’m really happy. Look at you guys! Healing over past trauma. Feels good, doesn’t it?” 

Pearl pushed some hairs into place. “It does feel good.”

“Really good.” Bismuth pressed.

“I’m so happy for you, but ew. But also, I love it. How long have you guys been together for now?” The teenage raven-haired boy asked.

“A couple of weeks now. It’s very fresh.” Pearl said.

“Are you guys free today? I don’t have any plans. Wanna hang out and grab some food? Or we can watch a movie.” Steven suggested.

“We have been meaning to watch Home Alone for a little bit now.” Bismuth said.

“Isn’t that the horror movie about the kid who has to fend off home intruders?” 

“THANK YOU!” Bismuth asserted, clapping and pointing to Steven.

“Okay, okay. I get it.” Pearl appeased them. “If you haven’t seen the movie, the description is a bit concerning. You have to watch it to understand.” She laughed. 

Steven had a million other questions for the pair about their relationship and how they finally ended up together but avoided pressing on to allow them privacy. If they wanted to give more information, he would let it be offered organically. 

They ended up starting their afternoon by watching Home Alone. After it was finished, Pearl shook her head. “Looking at the movie with a new perspective I can see how it’s a little disturbing.” She suggested.

“THANK YOU!” Steven and Bismuth yelled at the same time. They looked at each other and laughed.

“I really missed hanging with you guys,” Steven said. “Don’t get me wrong, living on the road, finding myself, and making new friends has been awesome. But it’s different with the gems. You really get me, and I can be myself around you. 17 years, can’t break that bond, huh?”

Pearl and Bismuth agreed. Pearl missed Steven more than anyone. It was hard for her to adjust to life without someone. Her instinct to care for people had never faded away. Her new relationship with Bismuth made things easier than ever. Having someone to confide with about things and be there for her when she needed it was helpful and comforting. The emptiness no longer existed, it was filled with that familiar love and acceptance.

“So,” Steven began. “You guys have…. done the deed.” He said with a slight tinge of discomfort in his voice. “Have you fused yet?”

Bismuth looked to Pearl. Pearl nodded her confirmation. “Do you want to meet her?”

Steven stood up rather excitedly and nearly jumped up and down. “Yes! Yes, yes, yes! A thousand times yes.”

Pearl reached for Bismuth’s hand. Bismuth accepted, taking it and bending down. Their foreheads touched. With an exceptional glow, they fused into Moonstone. Their large, beautiful, brilliant form stood in front of him. She almost hit the ceiling with her height. At least in the temple, the rooms were large enough to make room for almost all sizes of fusions, but this was not a house sized properly for fusions. 

Steven’s grin stretched from ear to ear. “What’s your name? You’re awesome!” Steven declared.

“Moonstone.” The fusion answered. Her voice was deep but elegant at the same time. It was hypnotizing.

Steven’s grinned was soon joined by tears. He was overjoyed with happiness. Seeing Pearl so free, open, and happy was enlightening. He clapped and sat back on the couch. Moonstone unfused, and Pearl approached Steven. 

“Steven, are you alright?” She asked.

“I’m so happy.” Steven choked through tears. “I love you guys so much.” He pulled them both in for a hug again and cried into Bismuth’s chest. “Thank you for making Pearl happy.” He said to Bismuth. “But if you hurt her…”. He trailed off. “Kidding. But really.” He narrowed his eyes at her. “Don’t hurt Pearl.”

Bismuth laughed and knew she would never want to hurt Pearl. She wouldn’t do anything that would jeopardize their relationship. She loved Pearl so much and really didn’t think anything could get in the way of that. 

But little did either of them know, something was going to threaten their perfect relationship very soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oof, I've got the next chapter written already, but I'd love some ideas on what you think will happen! If I get a few comments I will update a little faster! I've been really busy with school and work but am trying to write as much as I can! Also, we're nearing the end of this story. It's going to be a total of 20 chapters. :) I'm really excited for you guys who've stuck with me for this long!

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time writing fan-fiction for Steven Universe! I'm really excited for this story and have big plans for it. I would greatly appreciate any feedback in the form of comments. If anybody has any suggestions I will gladly take them into consideration. If you liked it, please let me know! It will definitely encourage me to put up the next chapter faster!


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